Thursday, September 14, 2006

Expiry date

Ever wondered about the fact that the biggest uncertainty in your life is actually your life span??!! You plan, save, invest and do a million other things just because you don't know when your last day on this planet is!

Life would have been really easy if God had put an expiry date on every baby's forehead as it left His production line.. (The Production line analogy is really easy ... God has a billion vendors each specializing in producing one thing in the human body. So the tooth vendor makes all kinds of teeth, the eye vendor makes all kinds of eyes etc. God has a ISO:9000 certified production line and Just-In-Time procurement cycles. So using neural networks, all vendors can predict when God is gonna assemble the next baby, and they send the parts just-in-time for God to set it up. He must definitely have an instruction manual for all His production-line employees to know where to put what .. Ever once a while a new employee comes and messes up. Finally the finished product gets shipped via a stork with a tracking number. This tracking number is exactly what the doctor sees and calls it the "due date!", and delivery takes approximately 9 months! And all this while we have been praising Ford for coming up with that concept!)

Well, coming back to my original argument that everyone must have an expiry data, ever wondered how simple it would have been to lead your life?? Every parent before giving birth to a baby would be taught Microsoft Projects (yeah!!). The moment the stork comes and delivers your baby, you see the expiry date on its forehead. That's the end-date of your baby project. Then using the Wizard tool in MS Projects, you start planning backward till today!! Assign milestones like .. Baby walks, Baby talks, Baby meets first girlfriend, Baby becomes an Engineer, Baby marries, Baby has first baby etc. etc. Depending on the lifespan, the baby could do more things. Lesser life span = lesser milestones, lesser budget, lesser stress, and more enjoyment!!

If I know I gonna last for just 2 more years, I know I don't need to earn that much and I can retire and enjoy the rest of my life! However, if I am gonna last till "Baby's baby gives birth to another baby" milestone, then I need to work till I am 58 years old (unless my baby doesn't decide to wait to give birth to a baby till it is 18 and the baby's baby phase happens before!) and save money all the while, invest, buy property, and generally be a miser!

You will have assigned targets in your life. You would know that you have to work towards a milestone, and wouldn't be confused with what you have to do! You wouldn't make earning money as a goal in your life. Its crazy to work just to earn money! Job satisfaction is in fool's paradise. Everyone works for money! And everyone saves money just cause they don't know when they are gonna kiss goodbye to everyone and buzz off...

I know, most of you ( I mean the two of you who read this!) wont agree with me. But its a thought to ponder. After all, no one likes bad surprises, its always easy to lead a planned life!!


  1. am one of the 2 readers who reads ur blog. Am not into commenting. But this one was too Kewl!
    the assembly line, tracking number...Gee, is this really you!!!

  2. Luvly, My face changed expressions thru the blog. Not a lot of times does anyone make that happen to me.

    And hey dude.. u must take it easy on us with hard facts of life. Ignorance is a bliss, and forgetfulness an asset with such facts of life. Nyways, I must make myself understand that I need to comment on your blog & not blog myself!! Not everybody has a talent to do that (effectively ofcourse).

    However, Great Work!

  3. I am here to surprise you by being the third person to read that blog. But I must remind you that you are ignoring all external factors that affect the feasibility of your project. Like the baby's baby would need to have a baby's wife first and I see you heading nowhere on that front. Kidding!! Good I stay so far warna pata nahi kitni maar khani padti. Keep blogging, I am enjoying reading it..

  4. Its an interesting analogy u got going there...the production line and the vendors with the different body parts;-) I think its time somebody had the birds and bees talk with you:-)

    Like u said there is no expiry date pasted on our foreheads but the expiry date is non the less PARTY ON!!:-D