Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Its a man-thing

Other than my man-voice and man-beard, I am pretty much a chicken in man’s clothing. So you wont generally find me doing man-kind activities (if you are a damsel in distress, don't go all bachao bachao on me, I ain’t gonna come and help ya!).

That means, I don’t man-swear (f#$k, b$%ch), man-drink (hick), man-drive (zooooom), man-ride (yeah I look like a sissy on a motorbike), man-fight (I prefer running), man-flirt (yup, I suck miserably at that) or man-body build (the less I talk about this the better it is). All this, like you already guessed, hurts my fragile man-ego a lot.

So today after ages, I got to do a man-kind activity. Yeah, I changed my car’s punctured tire. Now for you man-beef guys its no big deal, but for me its been an accomplished. It took me well over 20 minutes and well, I was sweating, huffing and puffing, but I successfully pulled it off. And now my back and my wrist hurts, but well, those are minor inconveniences suffered while doing man-kind activities.

Yeah, I am that good!

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Singing Sensation

Being an Indian, I am expected to sing at social gatherings, irrespective of how bad (hoarse) I sound. Its more like if you sing well – you are good, but if you sing bad (like me) then you are plain amusing. I think this is a very cultural thing. When 2 Indian people get together we bitch about the third one, and when the third one joins we sing. And if the third one is like me, we make him sing throughout the night or till he feels so embarrassed that he leaves.

Over the years, after having been the most popular singer (grrr!) in most social gatherings, I have figured there are some Hindi songs that I can sing without losing breath. I mean people still laugh, but they just LOL and don’t ROFL. So here is my list of sing-able songs for guys who bray like me. The songs are definitely very nice, but they just “can” be sung (badly) without losing your breath.

Allah Ke Bande – Kailash Kher

This song was my first chance discovery. We were on our bus trip to Las Vegas way back in 2006. Well, it was a Chinese bus tour, but all the occupants of the bus were Indians (with a Chinese tour guide!). So immediately after the bus started rolling, everyone had to sing. Now, I generally can fall asleep immediately in any moving vehicle, and I guess by the second song I was already fast asleep with my mouth wide open. Somewhere in the noon, I was jolted awaken by my co-passenger – “Girish, go go your turn to sing”. And in my semi-dozed state I sang this song. Rest they say is history (last heard the tour guide took up Zen and has retired from the tourism industry altogether).

Josh walon ko – Jagjit Singh

This one was during one of my birthdays in Uncle Sam’s land (after the bus tour). My friends forced me to sing (specifically insisting on me not singing the earlier song). I tried to sing this one. Now its a very deep and serious song. I remember all my friends were crying after I finished (the kind of tears that come when you laugh so bad that it hurts in your stomach).

Hum Bewafa Hargiz Na The - Shaan

While I was stuck in the hotel this time around (without internet), for days together I had no one to speak to. I missed hearing my own voice and decided to sing. The only song I had on my laptop then was this one. I remember singing it throughout the day on one Sunday. In the evening I realized that the entire floor in my hotel was empty. Coincidence I say, that all people checked out on the same day.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Blogger’s block

I dont exactly qualify as an “author” to have a writer’s block. But what I have been facing lately has got to do something with my inability to update my blog. I know I have had a hectic last month, but I am sure if I think hard, I could have easily made way for an hour of updating my blog. But each time that I sat down saying now I am gonna write something over here, I spent an hour seeing Lady Gaga videos and just generally fooling around on the internet.

I researched on the internet about “Blogger’s block” and if it exists. Mighty Google told me it does and I indeed came across some very well written articles about how to overcome it. Some of my veteran blogger friends might find these posts useful.

So I decided I blabber a bit here. One of the tips to overcome blogger’s block is to write outside of your niche. Now, long term readers of my blog know that my niche is – cracking fat jokes about myself. (I know I have repeated them to such an extent that most of you shun away when I open my mouth). So without further ado, I am gonna write about - Theology.

According to Wikipedia, Theology is the systematic and rational study of religion and its influences and of the nature of religious truths. Deep indeed. My knowledge of theology is limited to understanding its meaning. So I leave it at that.

While I was researching about my article about Theology, I chanced upon what does the ado (in without further ado) stands for. Apparently ado stands for “fuss” or “delay”. If you spell your further ado as “further adieu”, you are using the French word for goodbye. So your statements actually mean “without further goodbye”. Thanks fluffy for explaining that to me.

And this also means two other things – I came over my blogger’s block by writing this idiotic post and I actually got you interested in theology. See! Life is simple. Now if I keep this post as a draft too long, I am sure I am gonna delete it. So just as I finish this sentence I press the “Publish” button. Here it is.