Sunday, November 19, 2006

Agreement

After years of fighting in vain to get rid of my bulge (tummy for you uninitiated!), yesterday night we ( I mean my stomach and me) signed a strategic agreement. Its a 54 page document on which both of our lawyers agreed upon. Here is a gist of the deal:

  1. I shall not do any more ab exercises. These exercises prove harmful to the growth of Mr. T (for tummy!).
  2. I shall not restrict food intake. It directly affects the well being of Mr. T. By the power vested in Mr. T by the constitution, it is illegal on my part to do so.
  3. Mr. T has agreed to deposit all the fat that I shall consume. This way, if I get stranded in the Sahara desert someday, Mr. T will take care of my well being, till help arrives.
  4. Mr. T shall cushion my fall, if I trip or lose balance. Mr. T will that way protect my face and keep me away from harm, risking its own life.
This strategic agreement will also help me in a lot more ways than you can imagine. First of all, I will be able to concentrate on other things in life than appearance. After all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and if some gal is gonna like me, she ain't gonna see if I walk alone or I am always accompanied by Mr.T. Imagine, if I save those 2 minutes that I spend looking at myself in the mirror everyday, at the end of the year I will have saved 12 hours!! I could probably end poverty in the world in that time!

Finally, whenever I have kids, they shall get to have a front seat view of the action. Let me explain. All the thin guy carry their kids in their arms. So when the dad is walking ahead, the kid is actually looking at a stranger following his/her dad and making strange faces (and for all you know, that guy actually thinks that he is entertaining the kid! Oh! How boring!). My kids will sit on Mr. T. So they will have front row action! They will see what I will see, how exciting!!

That reminds me of a joke that I had read somewhere..

Why can't fat men play golf?
Because if they keep the ball too close, they can't see it and if they keep it too far, they can't reach it :) !!

I am gonna end this post right now. I guess something someone said yesterday, hurt me a lot :) !!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Tips for people like me!

Breaking my pledge of writing a blog once every week, here I am sharing something useful that I came across on the big bad world of the internet a few weeks back. Well, its a compilation of articles that help you to get over your habit of procrastination (I had this article lying in my del.icio.us for 2 weeks, before I read it :P).

Let me warn you, its exclusively meant for people like me, so if you are that organized person who knows which trousers you are going to wear on the 3rd Saturday of next month, its not for you..

Also there are some very useful articles about how you can get more organized in life. That reminds me, getting organized is NOT buying a Palm PDA. I have a Palm, but then to get organized, you also need to use it :) !! All said and done, here is the link to the article..

http://www.lifeorganizers.com/home/

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Love and Betrayal

I bet my topic got you all thinking! Well I was going to add "sex" somewhere in the title too, cause I had heard that it sells. But then, I ain't selling anything out here, so kinda refrained from using that word :) !!

I don't intend to write a sleazy blog but I just thought I voice my opinion about this thought that has been tossing and turning me for the entire of my last weekend. Well, for most of you I know, this would come as a shock, but I am happily committed to this certain someone whom I met (and subsequently moved in with!) for the past 6 months of my life. I occasionally did glance at others here and there, but have been pretty much committed to her.

But last weekend, I did something terrible. I had to drive down to some place 400 miles from my home and since I care for her so much didn't want her to make that journey (It would be too tiring for her!). I ended up asking someone else to accompany me, and that is where the betrayal started :( !!

For you guys who couldn't make out anything, well I am talking about the Ford Mustang that I rented last week. Now, I am pretty much committed (shall I say am in love?) to my Civic, but the moment I lay my eyes on the Mustang, I could feel myself go weak in my knees.. Civic is certainly adorable and cute, but the Mustang has that nasty look which kinda says that "I wanna be punished" :) The heart pounding roar she gives when you step onto her gas peddle is something out of this world!! And then it was two days and 800 miles of a torrid love affair with a Mustang. But then, as if to punish me, on my way back, the fuel tank of the Mustang started misbehaving, and I started wishing I had got my Civic along with :) !!

Now, I have exactly understood why guys betray. They just go by external appearance and have no regards for feelings. This post was mainly written for me to come over my guilt :P !! I am trying to convince myself that I rented the Mustang, just because I loved my Civic and didn't want her to go so many miles. I hope you agree too ;) !!!

Thursday, November 2, 2006

Burp..

I have kept a personal deadline of writing a blog every week. Now my days go so fast, that before I realize; its already a week since I have written something and there is no new idea in my half-asleep brain.

Nothing much happened in my life last week, except for the fact that I put in 12 hours of work everyday! Yupp, work is like a never ending saga for me, the faster I try to finish it, more work gets piled up. But yet, my spirits were high throughout the week. Wonder why??

Well it all started a year back when a colleague of mine became a happy father! So, one year later he celebrated his daughter's first birthday! (Ahem, I understand that it makes no sense yet!). And he threw a big party for all of us. But as most of you know, last weekend was Diwali and many people didn't make it to his party. That made his estimates all go wrong, and he was left with a LOT of food.

Obvious choice to give away all that festive food was of course "we the bachelors". Yippee, the sight of soo much "fresh" food in our refrigerators made me and my roomies feel like millionaires. We had a ceremony in which we garlanded the refrigerator, stripped down to our bare essentials and danced around it. The fridge was our new God :)!! Economics always told me that food, water and clothing are our fundamental necessities and we just had enuf to fulfill one of them for a week!!

So we ate and then we ate and then we ate again. We ate the same food for breakfast, lunch, supper and dinner! (And in my dream, I again floated to the fridge and ate the same food :P !!) You would have never seen some one soo content with life! And finally after 4 days and 8 meals we saw the last of our love, our life disappear :( !! Sob .. Sob.. It was famine at our place again.

Then came Friday evening and two of my very sweet friends called all of us for dinner. And yippee, food was left again!! So 4 more days of absolute bliss :) !!!

I am still reeling under the after effects of sumptuous meals that I had last week. Well well, I have just changed my definition of "happiness". Its that state in a bachelor's life where he has access to "unlimited supply of food" in his refrigerator!

I know I sound like a scavenger .. burp... but I am not complaining :) !!

Reality check

Am I really busy or am I just pretending to be? Ahem, that's a difficult question, but the truth is, I haven't had (or made) the time to update my blog for the entire of last week. Living up to my procrastinating standards like always :) !!

Just came online to tell you guys that I am alive and kicking but my gray cells are sleeping. Coffee doesn't wake them up any longer. I have taken up some new responsibilities (willingly or unwillingly, I know naught!) and they are keeping me busy. Can you imagine, I haven't had the time to even read Dilbert today :(??!!

So while I sleep, let me give you a dose of some very cool stuff.

For your entertainment let me present you a video that I really like.. Here is YouTube in all its glory: