Sunday, February 13, 2011

Vertically challenged

As a roly-poly kid, I loved wearing horizontal bold striped shirts. The kinds that accentuated the contours of my oh-so-round stomach. Being a kid, I never cared for the world and everything was happy and fun till one fine day one over friendly uncle pulled me over and advised me “Never wear horizontal stripes – they make you look fat!”. “Instead, wear vertical stripes – they make you look leaner and taller than you really are.”

Being the young impressionable mind that I was, I guess, I really took his advice to heart. From that day onwards, I subconsciously started getting attracted towards striped clothes in all shops. Though I bought boring shades, I think I subconsciously made sure that they had vertical stripes to make me look “leaner and taller”.

After two decades of buying my own clothes, yesterday while I was pretending to arrange my wardrobe, I realized that my entire wardrobe is now a vertical stripped mess. Every piece of clothing that i have now has vertical stripes on it.

I am sure none of you who see me regularly think that I am tall or lean. But I am sure everyone feels that I am a clown with my stripped dressing pattern. So, what is the learning you ask? Never let your kids take advises from overfriendly uncles. And if you are fat, no amount of vertical stripes are gonna make you look thin.

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