Be a Zero

I have been obsessed with the GoPro lately. Unless you are living under a rock, I am sure you have come across someone somewhere sporting a GoPro already. It’s a high definition camera that can do “extreme action video photography”. You just mount it somewhere (using its mounting options) while you are doing crazy stuff and then playback to enjoy it! And then ofcourse upload it to Facebook, Twitter, YouTube for the world to admire and be jealous.

If you are tired bored and lazy on a Sunday afternoon, already done seeing all sesame street videos and mindless YouTube surfing, then I would highly recommend you to go see other people’s GoPro videos. And now, even before you proceed with this blog post, go see Kelly McGarry’s 72ft backflip over a canyon with his mountain bike while wearing a GoPro HD HERO3+ right here:

GoPro – Mountain bike backflip

After spending countless hours going through all those videos, I am naturally tempted to buy a GoPro. Yeah, I have been contemplating getting one for the past few months and each time that I walk upto a store to pick one up, I stop myself from pouring all those hard earned dollars down the drain by thinking about the typical heroic life of Girish. Mind you, I don’t surf, skate, kayak, base jump, wing-suite, sky dive, bungee jump, mountain bike, ski, snow board. The most exciting thing I do is – stand in the balcony and look down at tiny people walking on the road.

So, lets say I get a GoPro. What would I wear it to get an exciting video out for? My typical day involves travelling in a crowded train for an hour to and fro daily. My GoPro would capture seas of uninterested and bored people busy playing candy crush on their phones. Then I go to the office and spend hours staring at a computer screen making mindless presentations or boring dashboards. Then I come home, watch nonsensical television, eat and call it a night. Weekends are spent cleaning, washing, cooking and staring at the ceiling.

Just like Rolls Royce has a policy of choosing customers for its cars (yeah, you can’t just buy it off the showroom!), even GoPro should have a policy of selling their cameras only to the cool people amongst us. That way, it will save some hard earned monies for morons like me. But yeah, that won’t make the company the billions that they are raking in now. It’s always the morons that make or break a company, and very soon I am gonna make one.