How to lose a customer?

True story.

Have been going to the same sports store as long as I remember. A small family run store in the heart of Sec-17 Vashi. Went to get a pair of swimming goggles last week. Picked up one, and went swimming only to find out that the protective film that was put on the glasses had got stuck to it (must be because it was in store for a long long time!). Instinctively went back to get it exchanged.

Take two.. The owner becomes angry and starts shouting at me. I protest, and walk out of the store forever. The cost of the goggles? Rs. 200 (approx 5$). The outcome? The owner lost a loyal high-spending customer (one of those wannabes who buys all the high-end sports equipment hoping that his game would improve :P) along with half a dozen of that customer's close friends!

Ironically, I got a better pair of goggles by the same company at a cheaper price in a factory outlet close by! As for my swimming, I still am equally bad with or without the goggles :) !! Just that now I look a lot more cooler, and most people can't recognize me as the same old bad swimmer, in the pool :) !!

Candle lit...

I did the most romantic thing that a single 27/M/Mumbai can think of. Yeah, I had a candle lit shave! "Candle lit shaving" is the art of shaving in candle light when you are getting late for office and the electricity in your home is cut off. Its the pleasure and pain of cutting yourself and not figuring out till you apply after-shave. Its the grandeur of leaving stubble at hard to reach places cause the candle light wasn't bright enough. Its the magnificence of making your face look like a lawn mowed by a drunkard. All said and done, the romance was soo intense that my face is still burning 3 hours after the act...

Horn OK Please?

So Mumbai decided to observe the World Health day by designating it as a "No Honking day". The city where the first thing that you do after buying a truck is paint "Horn OK Please" on the back of it with a motley of colors available at your local painter's shop (with his take at artistry) its ironic to expect people not to honk for a day.

I decided to not honk and live up to the expectations of the Traffic police. And lo-behold I took 45 minutes for a 3 km drive which I otherwise took 20 odd minutes coupled with honking :)

Well, not honking in my city is not practical. For us to not honk, we should first learn to follow lanes. There is no lane discipline. Most of us just inch towards our destination by pushing our vehicles in every conceivable place on the road that we can imagine (that includes the oncoming traffic lane too!!). Also, almost every road in my city has been dug up. It feels more like driving between craters, than on roads!! All this with people crossing the road, the bicycles and the auto rickshaws (The article on Autorickshaws in Wikipedia is very informative, check it out :) !!). I bet the only reason auto rickshaws are built with a single wheel in the front is for them to sneak into spots that 4 wheelers cant go and create trouble. All said and done, this is my first "protest" blog. Please follow lane discipline, and silence and peace will follow :) !! I really pity the Mumbai Traffic Police. They have a tough job to do!

Bambaiya

So I am back from an amazing vacation, and I thought I write about a small observation that I made.

We, the people, are fond of smelling each other's armpits. Don't believe me? Check out the rush for suburban trains in Mumbai. Everyone is eagerly waiting at the platform to catch the train so that they can smell someone's armpits. The moment the train approaches the station everyone runs for the door so that he can get the best armpit to smell.

I traveled a couple of times by the train, and me too caught onto the habit. I chose the armpits in the second class compartment. I was eagerly waiting at the station for the train to arrive. The moment it got into the station, I jumped in it, even before the people interested in getting down could do so. I chose the smelliest armpit and stuck to it. On the other hand, in no time atleast 4 other people stuck to my left and right armpit. I enjoyed the smell till the last station. It was a memorable journey.