How to lose a customer?

True story.

Have been going to the same sports store as long as I remember. A small family run store in the heart of Sec-17 Vashi. Went to get a pair of swimming goggles last week. Picked up one, and went swimming only to find out that the protective film that was put on the glasses had got stuck to it (must be because it was in store for a long long time!). Instinctively went back to get it exchanged.

Take two.. The owner becomes angry and starts shouting at me. I protest, and walk out of the store forever. The cost of the goggles? Rs. 200 (approx 5$). The outcome? The owner lost a loyal high-spending customer (one of those wannabes who buys all the high-end sports equipment hoping that his game would improve :P) along with half a dozen of that customer's close friends!

Ironically, I got a better pair of goggles by the same company at a cheaper price in a factory outlet close by! As for my swimming, I still am equally bad with or without the goggles :) !! Just that now I look a lot more cooler, and most people can't recognize me as the same old bad swimmer, in the pool :) !!

Candle lit...

I did the most romantic thing that a single 27/M/Mumbai can think of. Yeah, I had a candle lit shave! "Candle lit shaving" is the art of shaving in candle light when you are getting late for office and the electricity in your home is cut off. Its the pleasure and pain of cutting yourself and not figuring out till you apply after-shave. Its the grandeur of leaving stubble at hard to reach places cause the candle light wasn't bright enough. Its the magnificence of making your face look like a lawn mowed by a drunkard. All said and done, the romance was soo intense that my face is still burning 3 hours after the act...

Horn OK Please?

So Mumbai decided to observe the World Health day by designating it as a "No Honking day". The city where the first thing that you do after buying a truck is paint "Horn OK Please" on the back of it with a motley of colors available at your local painter's shop (with his take at artistry) its ironic to expect people not to honk for a day.

I decided to not honk and live up to the expectations of the Traffic police. And lo-behold I took 45 minutes for a 3 km drive which I otherwise took 20 odd minutes coupled with honking :)

Well, not honking in my city is not practical. For us to not honk, we should first learn to follow lanes. There is no lane discipline. Most of us just inch towards our destination by pushing our vehicles in every conceivable place on the road that we can imagine (that includes the oncoming traffic lane too!!). Also, almost every road in my city has been dug up. It feels more like driving between craters, than on roads!! All this with people crossing the road, the bicycles and the auto rickshaws (The article on Autorickshaws in Wikipedia is very informative, check it out :) !!). I bet the only reason auto rickshaws are built with a single wheel in the front is for them to sneak into spots that 4 wheelers cant go and create trouble. All said and done, this is my first "protest" blog. Please follow lane discipline, and silence and peace will follow :) !! I really pity the Mumbai Traffic Police. They have a tough job to do!

Bambaiya

So I am back from an amazing vacation, and I thought I write about a small observation that I made.

We, the people, are fond of smelling each other's armpits. Don't believe me? Check out the rush for suburban trains in Mumbai. Everyone is eagerly waiting at the platform to catch the train so that they can smell someone's armpits. The moment the train approaches the station everyone runs for the door so that he can get the best armpit to smell.

I traveled a couple of times by the train, and me too caught onto the habit. I chose the armpits in the second class compartment. I was eagerly waiting at the station for the train to arrive. The moment it got into the station, I jumped in it, even before the people interested in getting down could do so. I chose the smelliest armpit and stuck to it. On the other hand, in no time atleast 4 other people stuck to my left and right armpit. I enjoyed the smell till the last station. It was a memorable journey.

What has changed?

Yeah, I am acting a bit weird, a foreigner in my own motherland. Why so? Things have changed quite a bit in the last 2 years that I have been away. So I thought I make a list of things that have noticeably changed!

1. Electricity load shedding up to 4 hours everyday. Its a pain, but I guess my city of Navi Mumbai is facing energy crisis, and electricity is actually being rationed for all of us here :( !!
2. Toll for parking anywhere and everywhere!! I can't believe, but I have to pay toll at every place that I try to park my car. I mean, even my neighborhood grocery store parking is no longer free :( !!
3. Huge malls and movie theaters everywhere. Before I went, my town just had a single theater and a single mall. Now there are more than 4 movie theaters with a gazillion screens, and yeah as I write there are 5 huge malls in my vicinity with 3 more coming up.
4. Traffic. Now practically everyone in my neighborhood owns at least 2 cars. Traffic is a mess, and am scared of driving :( !!
5. Mobile phones. They are ubiquitous. I am probably the only one in this country that doesn't own one now :) !!
6. Mobile phone models. Yeah, in US you just drool over the iPhone, come to India and you have so many drop dead gorgeous phone models, that you end up wagging your tongue in the phone shop :P
7. Pollution. Smog smog everywhere.
8. Customer service. Yeah that was an unknown term for most of us. But now its amazing. Most people in the service sector have become amazingly courteous and friendly!
9. Health clubs. Yeah, lots of choices now!!
10. FM Stations. Yippeee... So many FM stations, its cool, entertainment on the run!! I haven't ever heard soo much radio and soo many Hindi songs, as I have in the last few days!!
11. Internet speeds are increasing and prices are dropping. Yippeee... now I can actually thrive :) !! Imagine, I had the option to choose between ADSL, PPPoE over Ethernet, and a Wireless Internet connection protocol which I have no clue what it is, but they actually install a dish at your home!! Freaking awesome :) !!
12. Mouthwatering food. I am rediscovering Indian cuisine, that I missed so much. I have been thriving on Vada Pav, Samosa, Masala Dosa, Indian Chinese, Tandoori and the rest. Huh, and I managed to regain all the 3 pounds that I had painstakingly burned off in the last 1 year. I am eating as if there is no tomorrow :) !!
    

Hats-off to Alcohol!!

What happens to all your electronic equipment when you leave it unused in a damp dusty environment? You guessed it right they simply stop working. Well its a bad feeling to see all your favorite things dead.. but you won't believe when I say that I could revive most of them. Huh, its amazing the amount of torture electronics can take today!! Most of my electronics could be revived by just cleaning its contacts by the "Music Cassette Head Cleaner fluid". I ain't exactly sure but it just contains some kinda alcohol is what I believe. So there it is. Alcohol saved my day!! My lovely music system, my car deck, all my remotes and my Computer (at least part of it!) are revived and rocking. Huh, I saved quite a bit of money all thanks to Alcohol. Yeah, and you thought that only consuming it was good :) !!

Back home

So, I am finally back in India, back at home, and enjoying the new found freedom. No work, at home or in office, and kinda enjoying this "no responsibilities" phase of my life :) !! I am gonna be gone on vacation for 2 weeks, and since there is no Internet around, I wouldn't be writing for at least 2 more weeks!!

3 Pancakes down

Yeah, me reached Hongkong Airport. Don't know why they made us get out of the airplane. But, well here I am, sitting in the Burger King in HKG Airport, already gobbled 3 pancake breakfast for 26 HKG dollars. Wonder how much it shows up in USD on my Credit Card day after!! Very forgettable 14 hour journey I had from SFO to HKG. Did nothing but eat and sleep. Yeah, got to catch up on my sleep and technically dreamt for the first time in a flight!! Actually, had a nightmare and got up to see the guy next to me sleeping on my shoulder! Yikes!! Shrugged him off and went for a leisurely tour of the plane at whatever unearthly hour it was!!

Its actually 3:15 PM for my bio-clock, but I guess I already have adjusted myself to the Hongkong Standard time (how else do I explain the sudden urge for a pancake breakfast?). Anyways, now my next halt will be Singapore before I reach my country!! Adios amigos, until we meet again!!

A day to go

I can't believe I can get all sad and nostalgic about this. But leaving a place that you have inhabited for 2 years sure does hurt. Its a bitter sweet feeling actually.

There are all these people you have been with that make you feel special, make you feel important and wanted. You know that you are gonna miss this place, but the reality doesn't really dawn on you. I somehow have never felt the pain of leaving a place till I actually left it! You try to assimilate as much as you can. You try to do that routine one last time!

Today when I packed up all my stuff in my office, and looked at it, I actually relived the entire 2 years in a flash. I sure am gonna miss each and everything and each and everyone that I have been associated with. But, on this last evening in California, as the sun sets behind me, I have this small flicker of hope in me, that things are going to be far better for me in the future and I am gonna enjoy my life to the fullest!

Ferrari Spotting in the wild

Every guy's dream machine. If you can't spot the difference between a Corvette and a Ferrari, your life is doomed to misery.


My proximity to Walnut Creek and my infrequent visits to Beverly Hills have helped me to do one thing in plenty - drool on a lot of Ferraris in the wild. I mean, I know every guy on this planet has seen a picture of a Ferrari atleast once in his lifetime, but watching her zip past you is a different feeling altogether. I have been privileged enough to have seen more than 10 Ferraris (mind you it still is just around 10 in more than 2 whole years!). I remember once I followed a Ferrari F430 for 6 miles (completely away from my destination) just so that I could see her. The funny part of the entire session was that every signal we would be together and then the car would zip past me only to hit her brakes again (remember the speed limit on most California city roads is just 35 mph?) and I would happily catch up with her till the next signal :) !!!

Well, the reason for this post of mine is two fold. I not only shamelessly followed a Ferrari 360 Modena today (again!), but I also got to take her picture. Well, so close was I, that I actually could see "Ferrari" written on her brake calipers!! Yippeee... I feel soo good. I know I should be dreaming of owning one, but the feeling of seeing her itself is ecstatic :) !!

And for the uninitiated amongst us, Ferrari 360 Modena is the same car that Fiat gave to our beloved Sachin Tendulkar...